My Dating Relationship Advice

If you feel that you’re ready to enter into a more permanent type of relationship, such as living together or even marriage, there are a few things you should take into consideration before making that final commitment. A successful marriage is such a rare thing these days that they get more attention than the break ups do. That says a lot of sad things about relationships now. However, if you can avoid a few relationship killers, you have a lot more of a chance to succeed than if you didn’t know about them.

The first one is emotional immaturity. There are some people that never grow up no matter how old they get. You may have seen T-shirts that say “I may get old, but I refuse to grow up.” While this may be cute on a T-shirt, it’s not so cute when people are acting this way within a marriage. They’re only setting themselves and their partners up for failure. This is a miserable way to try to live. Now, this doesn’t mean you have to be serious all the time or anything like that. What it DOES mean is that you can’t let your emotions control you and affect how you treat your spouse.

Selfishness is something else that will destroy a marriage. Closely related to this is self-centeredness. Please note that this kind of behavior doesn’t mean the same thing as taking care of yourself. In fact, it’s important to take care of yourself if you’re going to be in top shape for your spouse. Selfishness and self-centeredness is that “me, me, me” attitude that many people seem to have. This is saying that your needs are more important than that of your partner. On top of that, a self-centered person is constantly critical or trying to place blame rather than looking closely at his or her own behavior. Self-centered people think there’s nothing wrong with manipulating their partners in order to get what they want.
Then there’s instant gratification. You may wonder how this can kill a marriage. Think of it in terms of fast food. Since fast food was introduced to the public, people have decided that they want their food in 30 seconds, hot, delicious and inexpensive. Many people look at life and relationships in much the same way. If everything isn’t perfect for some people, they will start complaining about their marriage or relationship. Their marriage becomes much like fast food. Rather than treasuring it and enjoying it, the marriage becomes something to throw away if it’s not immediately perfect.

When you combine all of these relationship killers with figuring that if things don’t work out you can just get a divorce, it’s little wonder that the divorce rate is so high. If a marriage is going to work successfully, it takes maintenance from both parties. For those couples that engage in damaging actions, it’s going to take even more work. However, if you’re willing to work on it, you can create the marriage you want: Happy and fulfilling.